5 Techniques Mental Health Awareness Week
Simple ways to feel closer to a community
Our ancestors shared pressure as a group, while we frequently struggle with it alone
This week is Mental Health Awareness Week. The theme this year is community.
Why is community important?
Humans are a tribal species who have evolved to solve problems together. The challenge in today's world is that we are more isolated than ever before. We spend more time scrolling each day than in contact with real people. We often feel under immense pressure. Our ancestors shared this pressure as a group, while we frequently struggle with it alone.
Maybe you feel you are the only one on your team pulling your weight. Maybe none of your family help you with the essential household chores. Or maybe nobody asks you how you are. No one seems to take the time to really listen to you.
Today our aim is to strengthen our connection to one of our communities. To reduce the pressure and lighten the load.
None of the below is rocket science. All techniques are supported by multiple studies. But which one can you do today? Community only strengthens when we take action. My recommendation is to focus on the action that feels easiest for you.
Community starts by each of us reaching out to someone else. This could take the form of a simple smile and hello, it could be asking someone how their day is going. It could be a text we send letting someone know we are thinking of them.
Technique 1 - 15 minute Restorative Break
Starting a conversation requires energy. If our mood and energy levels are low its much harder to initiate a conversation with someone else. Therefore our first step is a 15 minute restorative break. Doing something away from our desk, that lifts our mood with no phone (phones mute our brains ability to recharge).
This could be a walk, run, stretch, enjoying a drink in peace, reading a book, for some people its even hanging out the washing. Whatever works for you. My restorative break today is a walk around the park booked in for 3pm - when will you take yours?
Technique 2 - Send one of our family a kind text
Think of someone in your family who might be grateful for some support. Who comes to mind? Send that person a text now letting them know that you care about them. This is the one I sent my mum this morning before I sent this post ‘Hi Mum, just to say that I love you, thanks for always being there x’. Who can you send a quick kind text to in the next 10 mins?
Technique 3 - Offer help to one colleague
Think of someone you know who might be carrying an ‘invisible load’. You just get the feeling that they are under pressure or don't seem their normal self. Can you start a conversation with them today? Using someone's name helps smaller interactions feel more meaningful to the other person. Something like “Hi Sam, how are you?” Listen carefully to their answer. Repeat back what they say (this helps the other person feel heard). Then say something like “if you need a hand with anything please let me know”.
Technique 4 - Send one thank you email
Who can you send a quick thank you email to today? Put ‘ thank you’ as the subject heading. Think how that will stand out in their inbox, how it will help them feel. Here are a couple I've sent last week;
Hi Conrad, thanks for your thoughts on this, it really helped.
Hi Anne, thanks for sending this across. Wishing you a moment in the sun today.
Technique 5 - Start a conversation in a queue
When standing in a queue this week ask the person next to you "how is your day going?" This might be at the bakery, cafe, gym, supermarket, lunch line. Proactively start a conversation with someone. See what happens, see how they respond, notice how you feel. Remember we are all connected. Why, when we see someone else yawn, do we start yawning? Why, when we see someone who looks sad, do we start to feel a little sad? Why, when someone has an accident in public do so many people rush to offer help?
When exchanging a few sentences with another person we release the feel good hormone oxytocin. This reminds us that beneath all the rushing and thinking we are all part of something bigger than ourselves.
You are a good person, doing your best. That’s the most each of us can do.
“You can’t move the conversation in a more positive direction until the other person feels heard and understood. And they won’t feel heard and understood until we’ve listened.”
― Douglas Stone
This week I enjoyed:
How to Protect Your Focus Without Burning Bridges here
Need a hand? Feel alone? Don’t wait, contact someone today. You deserve support as much as anyone else. You are not alone. Reply to this message if that’s easiest.
Text Shout - 85258 - simple support via text, I used when I wasn't sure who to turn to
Call Samaritans 116 123 - no problem too small, I've used a couple of times, once during a relationship break up, once when one of my family said they were suicidal and I wasn't sure who to ask for help
NHS Every Mind Matters - simple and effective resources you can access immediately here